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2,190,054 plays

3 years ago • 439757 notes • Reblog
0chromat: “ Mettaton EXes… I like his original form better aesthetically actually, but his ex form is more expressive. Overall I find his personality very charming/likable. Sorry for all the Undertale spam doodles esp for those who didn’t follow me...
3 years ago • 919 notes • Reblog
thestrangestchameleon: “ yeah. ”
3 years ago • 429450 notes • Reblog
high school: you will call me Mr. Smith because in college you will have to call all your teachers Dr. or Professor and be v formal with them
College: Call me Steve ok literally if any of you call me professor I'm leaving
3 years ago • 43776 notes • Reblog

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When people ask you why you make science puns:

timeclones:

image
3 years ago • 209377 notes • Reblog
dilfweed: “ Role model ”
3 years ago • 455513 notes • Reblog
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when people don't sit next to me on the bus: offended and relieved
when someone sits next to me: irritated yet flattered
3 years ago • 638471 notes • Reblog
3 years ago • 96123 notes • Reblog
straightforsharks: “when you type “parks and rex” instead of “parks and rec” ”
3 years ago • 245099 notes • Reblog
3 years ago • 24310 notes • Reblog

3rd grade

friend: *whispering* if you're stupid say "what"
me: what
friend: OH MAN
OH
OH DEAR FUCKING CHRIST
I GOT YOU SO GOOD, THAT WAS AWESOME
SWEET, SWEET DICKS IN MY MOUTH. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED THIS HARD. EVER.
JESUS. JESUS HELP ME.
3 years ago • 1042705 notes • Reblog

the-prince-is-right:

divorcedreality:

george washington rises from the dead

“you done fucked up”

“the fuck did i tell you about political parties”

image

“I SAID FOUR GODDAMN THINGS, AMERICA. POLITICAL PARTIES ARE DANGEROUS.  PAY OFF THE FUCKING DEBT. ISOLATIONISM! AND FREE FUCKING TRADE! SO WHAT DO YOU DO? ‘OH LET’S SPLIT THE GOVERNMENT! LET’S SPEND WAY TOO FUCKING MUCH! LET’S MAKE ALLIANCES!’ GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER AMERICA! GOD FUCKING DAMN IT I WILL TURN THIS COUNTRY AROUND.”

(Source: sailormango)

3 years ago • 435808 notes • Reblog
me: hoe don't do it
me: [stays up late]
me the next morning: oh my god
3 years ago • 448334 notes • Reblog
3 years ago • 112 notes • Reblog